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According to a high ranking Government source, because of the Failure on the part of the Government representatives, be they Congressional, Senatorial or Executive, in being able to balance a budget, agree on the smallest of items, and to actually represent the people instead of themselves, the Lincoln Memorial has been closed.
The source was quoted as saying that Mister Lincoln is pissed, he was President during a Civil War and still managed to run a country. He says that if these people can't get their shit together, he will remain on strike, and we may consider his ass glued to the chair.
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